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On the occasion of Gaura Purnima, having [re]read Caitanya-caritamrita, Adi-lila chapter 4

by Krishna Kshetra Swami


Alright, get this: He—that is, the One but not exactly Only primordial He, finding himself repeatedly running up against the exasperating fact of it,

 

that She—that is, His better-than-mirror, better half counterpart, other as none else,

 

had no love, except and save and only, exclusively, for him: a love so exclusive, so utter, so boundless and bounding and so awesomely leaping beyond the very notion of boundaries…

 

He, seeming to encounter boundaries, He, as I said, exasperated, unable to fathom, to be within her being, her living that fathomless love, He made a plan, a grand and glorious scheme, a divine cosmic supertemporal yet time-entering resolve in and for just the right time…

 

A time-entering resolve. You see, we’re not talking about any ordinary tom-dick-and-harry guy stumbling lost and witless into this bozo circus of someone else’s show of don’t-get-me-started fear and misery. No, we’re talking about that bigger-than-life Person neither you nor I can expect to just go and see on the TV however we might try, however many channels we think we have, it being entirely up to him to whom and whether, if at all, he might be visible, He might reveal himself.

 

Entirely up to him. I know, there are those who would deny altogether any such a one, but we won’t go there now, with more and bigger things to say…

 

What’s bigger? You see, it’s really all about relish: not you not I can begin to venture into the vast waters of rasa (a little-big Sanskrit word)—r-a-s-a = rasa = relish, relish of divine devotion—that swirl and sway and whelm and overwhelm of the one—really the two—we’re talking of; we think (or think we think) we have better things to do, when what is, what really is to be done, is to put our minds our hearts our everything in that ocean, that deep sweet nectar ocean of rasa.

 

It’s for this nectar ocean of rasa that He, that mega-fine Person (who has mega-names, among which his closest friends call him “Krishna”, the-all-attractive-one)… for experiencing even more fully than he would normally as himself this rasa of total boundless love of Her, that ultra-fine complementary Person (who has ultra-names, among which her closest friends call her “Rādhā”, the best of beloveds)…for Her He comes here, descends, not exactly from the clouds but from his home that makes our notions of “home” into crude imitation.

 

He comes here for Her, for Rādhā; Krishna comes, descends, sets up, makes place. It is here he comes, to this spinning top of a planet, this chunk of you-name-it ten-thousand temporary things that come and go, rocks-plants-animals-bypeds that come and go, come and go, remembered awhile then forgotten, hankered for, lamented for, fought over, died because of. It is here he comes, not for any thing else, but for Rādhā.

 

No, not exactly for Rādhā, but as Rādhā—as she who is the unplumbed deep of love, the vessel that is the storehouse, the primordial warehouse of every possible and every beyond possible shades and variations on perfectly artfully tastefully enacting and enacted love there could ever be.

 

As the vessel of love, rather than the object of love; as the subject of love, rather than the object of love… And you would still be right to ask for the why of it, and that is just the point: It is about why—there is purpose, a point to it, and we, you, me, all and every one and many and all of us, who are the tiniest of beings, who are but infinitessimal traces of that one complete Being, with whom we become complete—the why of us becomes unveiled within the why of Krishna’s coming, within his becoming the vessel, the subject, of perfect unending expanding love.

 

In becoming the subject, experiencing what is the glory of Rādhā’s love for Krishna, Krishna comes for us, comes to share with us the unboundedness, the way, the broad yet straight-and-narrow way that, though straight, circles, orbits, brings us to our proper place, place of being-becoming, with Him-Her, Her-Him, Rādhā-Krishna.

 

He comes for us, gives himself, gives His names, invites, welcomes “Just speak out my names, uplift your voice, sound the call, call out my names, allow your heart to open to these names which are Us, Rādhā and Krishna, names whom we are so very fond of hearing, names who bring us running to you who call, names who bear the original meaning of the word ‘name’.”

 

Okay, okay, I know, you might not believe this, I know it sounds far-fetched, but I didn’t make it up. Nor did any off-the-street guy dream this up. I know it’s way out there, and it’s easy to let it slide, but I say give it a good hearing. That’s what it’s about, beginning for the first time in our lives to hear what’s going on. So on this day, let’s give it a go. It’s His birthday, the day we know Him as Chaitanya, as Gauranga, as the Golden Avatara. On his birthday—we actually prefer to call it his “appearance day”—you’re invited to check out these names, the names of Krishna, of he who is the source of all joy, Rama, of she who is the very being of divine love, Rādhā, voiced as “Hare”. Do give it a try, and you just might find there is something to it, something that is a lot more than “something”, which is—who is—someone, the one who’s in your heart, the one waiting for you, waiting for your love, the one who are two, ever separated yet united. Give it a try, and see for yourself: hare krishna hare krishna krishna krishna hare hare hare rama hare rama rama rama hare hare.

Caitanya Mahaprabhu